Can you explain why?

When I am starting something, anything, I'm great. I start out with enthusiasm. I plan, research, ask questions, and investigate. I do everything I can for the 1st quarter. Then I taper off. I set it aside, I park it. I let it languish. It rusts, decays, even rots away. I've lost interest. I cannot help myself and I don't know why. I have a house full of partially started projects.

I say "I'm gathering new wind," " I'm getting reinforcements" or "I'll come back to it later." But I've really lost interest. I work in a mailroom where the mail must go out the day it is set out for; it is my salvation but it is forced on me. I've adjusted the machinery; tweaked it here and there; and that is the real challenge but it is something I must do. It pays the rent. Was it Attention Deficit Disorder? We didn't have a name for it when I was growing up, we called it lazy. The German today calls it "Aufmerksamkeit Defizit-Störung". Both my German grandmothers in their day would have called it "er hat nicht Sitzfleisch" the ability to sit down and remain seated. Hyperactive?

I'm good at telling other people what to do. I think we all are good at that. Maybe it is something else, maybe I am looking for that better way.

K.